Best humorous headlines

[Bill Greenwood]

Many people know of the humor paper THE ONION. They often take the latest news, be it political or celebrity or whatever is at the top and pull it to the limit of truth to have satire make a point. It's great laughs and real commentary at the same time. I wish I had been clever enough to start the paper, which I think is now an online site also.
Anyway, recently there was a listing of their best headlines.
One of my favorites is "Hijackers surprised to find themselves in Hellp, : "We expected eternal paradise for this," say suicide bombers.
The other great one was when they claimed a Gallup poll showed Obama was so unpopular that people would rather have dinner with Amajinadad (sp?) that the Pres. It's funny on its own, but the real laugh is the North Korean newspaper picked up the story and published it as a true story, not knowing what the Onion even was. I"d guess satire or even humor is not big in N Korea.

So, for the ever vigilant censors, what does this story have to do with aviation? Well mostly I think we can all use plenty of laughs, but to fit the narrow definition, the story came from the airline hijackings.
The motto of the paper is "serious funny business".

[rwanttaja]

So, for the ever vigilant censors, what does this story have to do with aviation?

"Boy Trapped in Refrigerator, Eats Own Foot."

14 Quatloos to whomever can point out the airplane tie-in of that headline.

Ron "Yes, I left a clue" Wanttaja

[Jonathan Harger]

"Boy Trapped in Refrigerator, Eats Own Foot."

14 Quatloos to whomever can point out the airplane tie-in of that headline.

Ron "Yes, I left a clue" Wanttaja

Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

[rwanttaja]

Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

Ah, a fellow connoisseur of the fine arts....

Ron "And don't call me Shirley" Wanttaja

[I_FLY_LOW]

I just want to tell you both, good luck. We're all counting on you...

[FlyingRon]

I don't know where I'll be then, Doc, but I won't smell too good, that's for sure.


See a broad get all booty eyed, lay er down and smack em yack em.

[I_FLY_LOW]

Well, it looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetimines...

A hospital?
What is it?
It's a big building with patients, but that's not what's important, right now.

[Jonathan Harger]

Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked... in the head... with an iron boot? Of course you don't; no one does. It never happens. Sorry, Ted, that's a dumb question... skip that.

[Floatsflyer]

Joey, ever been in a cockpit before? No Sir, I've never been up in a plane before. Joey, ever seen a grown man naked? Joey, did ya ever hang around a gymnasium? Joey, do you like movies about gladiators? ..........and in concert with Bill's original post: Do you know why the incidences of suicide bombers has drastically been reduced since 2009? Ever since the terrorists found out that Susan Boyle was a virgin, they haven't been so keen on going to Paradise!

[CarlOrton]

Awright, so we've veered off the path a bit.

So....how many have seen the 1957 movie Zero Hour, on which Airplane! was based? I just stumbled upon it a few months ago and was amazed at the number of scenes spoofed in the newer one.