Best humorous headlines

Many people know of the humor paper THE ONION. They often take the latest news, be it political or celebrity or whatever is at the top and pull it to the limit of truth to have satire make a point. It's great laughs and real commentary at the same time. I wish I had been clever enough to start the paper, which I think is now an online site also.
Anyway, recently there was a listing of their best headlines.
One of my favorites is "Hijackers surprised to find themselves in Hellp, : "We expected eternal paradise for this," say suicide bombers.
The other great one was when they claimed a Gallup poll showed Obama was so unpopular that people would rather have dinner with Amajinadad (sp?) that the Pres. It's funny on its own, but the real laugh is the North Korean newspaper picked up the story and published it as a true story, not knowing what the Onion even was. I"d guess satire or even humor is not big in N Korea.

So, for the ever vigilant censors, what does this story have to do with aviation? Well mostly I think we can all use plenty of laughs, but to fit the narrow definition, the story came from the airline hijackings.
The motto of the paper is "serious funny business".

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bill Greenwood

So, for the ever vigilant censors, what does this story have to do with aviation?

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"Boy Trapped in Refrigerator, Eats Own Foot."

14 Quatloos to whomever can point out the airplane tie-in of that headline.

Ron "Yes, I left a clue" Wanttaja

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rwanttaja

"Boy Trapped in Refrigerator, Eats Own Foot."

14 Quatloos to whomever can point out the airplane tie-in of that headline.

Ron "Yes, I left a clue" Wanttaja

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Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Jonathan Harger

Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

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Ah, a fellow connoisseur of the fine arts....

Ron "And don't call me Shirley" Wanttaja

I just want to tell you both, good luck. We're all counting on you...

I don't know where I'll be then, Doc, but I won't smell too good, that's for sure.


See a broad get all booty eyed, lay er down and smack em yack em.

Well, it looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetimines...

A hospital?
What is it?
It's a big building with patients, but that's not what's important, right now.

Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked... in the head... with an iron boot? Of course you don't; no one does. It never happens. Sorry, Ted, that's a dumb question... skip that.

Joey, ever been in a cockpit before? No Sir, I've never been up in a plane before. Joey, ever seen a grown man naked? Joey, did ya ever hang around a gymnasium? Joey, do you like movies about gladiators? ..........and in concert with Bill's original post: Do you know why the incidences of suicide bombers has drastically been reduced since 2009? Ever since the terrorists found out that Susan Boyle was a virgin, they haven't been so keen on going to Paradise!

Awright, so we've veered off the path a bit.

So....how many have seen the 1957 movie Zero Hour, on which Airplane! was based? I just stumbled upon it a few months ago and was amazed at the number of scenes spoofed in the newer one.

Is this PART Deux or do you just forget what you post? The joke was bad the first time around.


Too Good To Pass By[/h]

I hope that most of you will enjoy this; but for the starboard wing nuts among you, skip reading this and go elsewhere that is "politics" free.
This is not really about "politics", ie no one is coming to take your guns away, but it is about politicians.

The recent headline read, "Gallup poll shows that rural American would rather elect Pres. Ahmadinejad than Pres. Obama".
The govt. of Iran was delighted to read this latest news, and their national news agency, FARS promptly and gleefully republished the headline from the U S newspaper.

Only problem was the Iranians were not familiar with American satire and humor and didn't check their sources.
The real source was the paper, THE ONION,.

The Onion then even went along and claimed that FARS was really a subsidary of theirs.

The Iranians have since apologized for the false report, no word on if they have a sense of humor, but I found it hilarious, it made my day in the otherwise tense real world of worrying about if Iran may soon have nuclear weapons and all that that entails with Israel, etc.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by CarlOrton

So....how many have seen the 1957 movie Zero Hour, on which Airplane! was based? I just stumbled upon it a few months ago and was amazed at the number of scenes spoofed in the newer one.

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Not only were many scenes of Zero Hour satarized but much of its dialogue was also taken word for word for Airplane.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by CarlOrton

Awright, so we've veered off the path a bit.

So....how many have seen the 1957 movie Zero Hour, on which Airplane! was based? I just stumbled upon it a few months ago and was amazed at the number of scenes spoofed in the newer one.

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We watched it for a movie night at our EAA Chapter building. Of course many of us were laughing at the lines that are funny in Airplane but are meant to be serious in Zero Hour. Horribly bad movie ;)

Re the Onion: I had heard that it was a North Korean news source that made the mistake. Of course there is no reason why it couldn't have been both.

Working in DC, I find that I often have to look twice when reading a paper over someone's shoulder. (I am very ecology conscious that way.) There are days...sometimes weeks when you just can't be sure if you are looking at the Onion or the Washington Post.

Port, starbord, makes no difference. Really witty satire allows us to laugh at things too many people take too seriously -- even the things WE take too seriously.

I can't really remember whether it was N Korea or Iran, my friend says he thinks it was Iran. Doesn't really change the humor, that some dictator and some managed press picked up the story to score what they thought was a point against America and Obama., and the joke ended up being on them.
Great satire like the Onion is good because it is not only funny, but often makes a good point even by exaggeration.